Text: Bif Naked. Okenspay Ordway. Alcohol Or Comedy.

My life was comedy, quitting drinking was the easiest thing I've ever done, I have never looked back. I can not simply understand why the hell I waited so long?unmanageable life! What an embarrassment, what a weakness, what a ultimate lack of self-discipline, what a loser. My parents never drank or smoked; I put them through hell, poor parents. I was such an ungrateful disrespectful, selfish, hormonal little teenager, with a mouthy attitude, and sense of humor quite unlike my sisters. I decided I dint need to continue attending church with my parents; I was searching for my individuality. What an idiot, I wanted attention, I wanted everyone to think I was funny, I wanted everyone to like me, I hated myself. I was called bug eyes, I was called fish lips, and I was called modern dairies. The grade 9 gurls hated me they harassed me and beat me up. I wonder how those gurls are now. I wonder if they are living exciting fulfilling loving lives, I wonder if there happy and healthy. Me and my best friend Karime had every line of every Eddie Murphy movie down?.goo la goo goo, you could smell it, im a karate man! Karate man bruise on the inside so they don't show their weakness?banana in the tail pipe..bah boola bah boola bah boola bu ha ha bah boola bah boola bah boola ha! You name it I wanted to be Eddie Murphy or Robin Williams. I wanted to be them I still am enraptured with comedians, they must always be carefree and laughing and playing jokes, and having fun, except for maybe Richard Lewis, he always says he cant get a date, bet ya he can, bet ya hes really ticklish. Like me?tickled with life, tickled pink, pink ladies, black Russians, iron butterflies, Quitting drinking was the easiest thing I ever done, Quitting my comedic dreams was hard?I can never look back on either.