Text: Rodney O & Joe Cooley. Get Ready To Roll. Fo Funky Stories.

(feat. General Jeff)

[Rodney O]
On the south side, Rodney O was now cruisin
All of a sudden my car stops movin
Could I be outta gas? Hell no
Last night I filled up at Texaco
Popped the hood, smoke started comin up
Looked around and some punks started runnin up
Reached into the car under the drivers seat
Showed the metal and they took off down the street
Then I said to myself I better find a phone
Better yet I better not leave my car alone
You know whats up when they be smokin the rocks
Come back and your car be on crates or blocks
Yo, Rodney O won't go out like a biscuit
Better call triple A to come fix it
With all that went wrong looks like I lucked up
From down the street drivin up was a toe truck
Flagged him down got the 40 dollar hook up
Hit the car now its time for me to book up
Rollin out then I looked to my left
Saw the punks from before jackin somebody else
Funky stories

Fo' funky stories
1 down, 3 more to go yo

Playin some ball at the neighborhood jam
Feelin good cause every shot is goin in
I hit the winnin basket and I hollar out GAME
Get off the court and remember my name
But in through the door comes brother Joe Acker
Plays basketball like a middle linebacker
Shoes worn out, socks to his knees
Smellin like Bengay rollin up his sleeves
Yo, who got next he starts askin
Everybody knows brother Joe is good for hackin
Now he's slappin on my arm when I dribble
I'm gettin mad and I'm frownin up a little
But I try to stay calm and all that
But next time down the court he jumps all over my back
Yo whats up wit all that? Why don't you play right?
Cause if you ain't, we can have a fist fight
He runs down the court like it was nothin
I run up to him cause I ain't roughin
But he got the ball and made a shot
Everybody's laughin now I'm callin for the rock
I take brother Joe to the hoop real strong
And this time he got hit the stomach wrong
He lost his air and fell down
I jumped in the air, double pumped and I threw it down
After that I had nothin to say
Cause I knew brother Joe was done for the day

Four funky stories
Two down two more to go

[Rodney O]
In the city one night me and Drew was rollin out
Headin to the store playin music was bowlin out
Got pulled over don't know why and for what
Cop came to window and I said whassup?
Where ya goin son? Lemme see I.D.
And you're registration for this S.C.C.
What's the big deal did I run a red light?
Or do you just gotta mess with someone tonight?
He said don't get smart I'll write you up a citation
I said go ahead cause my time you're wastin
And if ya want, you can search my Benz
So call for backup and invite ya friends
The cop got mad and said I'll let ya go
I said I know cause ya can't fade Rodney O
Funky stories

Three down one more to go yo

[General Jeff]
Hadda date with a fly cutie that I just met
She let me on like she was soft and wet
So I wanted to hook up A.S.A.P
And after the date get the goods immediatley
She told me on the phone everything was her treat
She was gonna pick me up and take me out to eat
I gave her the directions to my place
But I took the wad just in case
And it was on meanin too good to be true
Reservation for two with a romantic view
Picked up the menu then I put it down
I didn't know we was in the hottest place in town
But she smiled and looked at me like it was ok
Thats when I knew I'd be orderin til the next day
We made a toast friends for a long time
Knowin that later on I was gonna get mine
But I played the role real smooth
Actin like I wasn't even in the mood
And when it came time for the check
The waiter came back and said the card was rejected
No sweat she pulled out another one
So I kicked back cause I was havin fun
Waiter came back same routine
I was on a date with a credit card queen
She left the table and went to the powder room
How come girls can never say bathroom?
But anyway she was gone for 20 minutes
The waiter thought that this was a plan and I was in it
I realized she was gone so I paid the tab
Went outside so I could call me a cab
I never saw the girl but I fell in love again
The cab driver happened to be my ex-girlfriend
Funky stories

Four down no more to go
No more to go